| |  Both women and men are victims of abuse. However, it is overwhelmingly women who are the victims of domestic violence. In fact being a female is the greatest factor that increases one's risk of becoming a victim of domestic violence. Statistics report that women are 95% victims of domestic violence. Domestic violence crosses all socioeconomic boundaries and each year statistics increase of women and girls dying at the hands of their abuser. Battered women and teen girls are of every age, race, religion, ethnicity, and social class, both single and married. As many as 60% of battered women also experience abuse during pregnancy.
Abuse in lesbian and gay relationships is a reality for approximately 25-45% of homosexuals in intimate relationships. Abuse in same-sexed relationships is not “just like” abuse in heterosexual relationships. The issues of a lesbian or gay victim of abuse are complex. Victims are often extremely isolated, not only due to the abuse but also due to the conditions of homophobia that exist in society. Reasons women stay in abusive relationships are complex and varied. Most of the battering may occur over a relatively short period of time. He may tell her and she may be convinced that this battering was the last. Generally, the less severe and less frequent the incidents, the more likely she is to stay.
The following are some of the most common reasons women stay in abusive relationships:
- Grew up in a home where her father beat her mother and so she accepts abuse as normal
- Economic dependence: she may not have marketable skills, her partner may control the money and give her an allowance for food, or she may need his help to support their children
- Fear: she sees no way to protect herself and/or her children
- Isolation: her partner is her only emotional support, he keeps her from friends and family members
- Low self esteem: he tells her no one else would have her and she has learned that her behavior has no effect on the outcome of her situation
- Social stigma: she is embarrassed and believes she has no power to change her situation
- Beliefs about marriage: her religious and cultural beliefs or the eyes of society demand that she maintains the façade of a good marriage, especially for the sake of the children. She was raised to believe in the importance of a good relationship with a man.
- Believes and hopes he will change. She values his good qualities and she is often motivated by pity and compassion as well as the fear he may commit suicide if she leaves.
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| Call us, we can help. It's free and confidential. Teen Advocate County-Wide (360) 376-5979 24 Hour Crisis Line Orcas Island (360) 376-1234 San Juan Island (360) 378-2345 Lopez Island (360) 468-4567 | |
